So with no work updates to share, you'll have to put up with my domestic woes & observations on the world of weddings, etc.
DOMESTIC WOE & PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT:
As those who have read my biography will know I love my Sat Nav & have only good things to say about this wonderful invention.
So imagine my dismay when I went out to my car the other week to go & meet a client & discovered my passenger window smashed & the contents of my glove box tipped out. Apart from the mess & the total aggravation nothing had been taken & at first glance it looked like pure vandalism. All made sense when about ten minutes later & whilst I was reporting the break in to the police, my other half wanders back from his car (parked on the other side of the road) to tell me the theives were after our Sat Navs because they'd taken his cradle. "Sorry, what?". Surely this takes togetherness too far, two cars broken into overnight - his 'n' hers break ins? For whatever reason, possibly because of my alarm, they hadn't taken my cradle & lead but seeing cradles, in this case ours, stuck to the windscreens is all the encouragment theives need to break in to search the glove box for your Sat Nav. Fortunately neither of us keep them in there but we now no longer keep our cradles stuck to our windscreens AND we wipe the tell tale ring they leave behind off too. Because, apparently, theives look out for these too.
One £60 excess later & a Friday night trek to see Mr. Surly - Shitty Mood - Autoglass, a cab ride to complete the worlds slowest shop in our local 24hr Tesco & a cab ride back to collect a car with a full set of windows from Mr. My Mood Has Not Lightened & Hurry Up & Sign Here -Autoglass & by midnight my brush with crime was over. But let my hard learned lesson be a lesson to all - you & I may love our Sat Navs but so too do theives.
What else has happened recently? Well, in the spirit of things breaking or ceasing to work in our little rented cottage (or across the road from, in the case of our car windows), the cooker door came off in my hand the other night. This follows, the door lock that wouldn't let us in & resulted in us calling a locksmith, the boiler that wouldn't provide us with hot water or heat, the dishwasher that has never worked & the leak from a missing washer upstairs that came through the kitchen ceiling. There I was cooking a meal, using the cooker for it's intended purpose & enjoying a glass of white, when I inoccently embarked on my usual fight to open the door & it literally came off in my hand!!!! So there I am, stunned & uttering some less than ladylike language & the other half is calling in from next door saying "what's happened?" "The door's come off." "What door?". "The cooker door!". By now, the wine has kicked in & I am in fits of laughter. Perplexed, he wanders out to the kitchen to survey the door, held high for inspection in my ovengloved hand, me doubled over laughing & the, can we call it an oven if it's doorless?, "cooking space". I then got to say, do you mind awfully darling holding this door for a moment so I can check the potatoes & I literally handed him the door. As an aside, I had to finish crisping the potatoes off in a frying pan & thankfully, even though some small component seems to have crumbled to bits, he did get the door back on & for the moment it works..........
Pop Quiz - First Dance?
Intimate smooch? Wish the floor would open up & swallow you? Or opportunity to throw some moves like a contestant on Strictly Come Dancing?
I thought I'd share my thoughts on the wedding first dance video that is causing a stir on Youtube.com at the moment. You may have heard about this on the news or in the papers but hearing is not enough, to see it is something else!
This is the couple that fullfilled the bride's desire to recreate the finale dance from the film Dirty Dancing by performing it as their first dance at their wedding. So, OK fair enough, if that's what floats your boat. But this is far more than just the couple dancing, this seems (from my memory of the film) like a blow by blow recreation of the final scene in all it's cringey detail. At the risk of sounding unkind or judgey - Eehhh!
The Bride (their wedding was some 18 months ago) told BBC news that at your wedding guests are your audience & you need to entertain them & yes, I agree - that's what the food, booze & DJ/Band, etc. are for. Their video appeared on Youtube four weeks ago, apparently so the bride could share it with her family , so they must be thrilled at the publicity & their being propelled into the media spotlight because it's given the TV & Film producer Groom the perfect vehicle to publicise his new film (trailer videos added to Youtube three weeks ago).
Lots of people have left comments saying how sweet, how much in love they look but all I can think, as someone with the love feelings myself, is do people that are so in love (& one hopes couples are in love when they tie the knot) really put on that performance for their first dance?
Now I am all for couples that disappear off to ballroom lessons so they can take to the dance floor with confidence - weddings are all about the bride & groom, all eyes are on you & a little confidence is no bad thing when stood alone in the centre of a dancefloor, in front of 200 guests. But can you imagine doing this? The rehearsal time & study of the DD DVD (they have a friend who is a choreographer who watched it, broke it down & taught it to them), the staging involved, the rounding up of friends & family willing to participate as extras or holders up of the bride (during her bounce & dive manouvre) that surely went in to this? I'm sorry but I see this as nothing more than two peacocks using their wedding as the ultimate vehicle for a spot of 'look at me, marvel at how fabulous I am' (sorry, I went to stage school for three years & got a lifetime's dose of 'show off' that now, when I see it, it gives me quite an adverse reaction)! Also, also, get the filming - what was involved here? At least two cameras & a good bit of editing to capture the spirit of the way the original was shot? So not just your usual wedding video guy then?
Add to this the link to the bride's wedding photography website & promo blurb posted with the video & the other promo stuff linked to it about hubby's latest film & this just looks to me like self promotion at it's tackiest. I very rarely have cards with me when at client's weddings because, in my opinion a client's wedding is not an opportunity to drum up business - but especially not if you're the bride & groom!!!!!
As Miss Romantic, whilst keeping a sensible head, I'd like to think that weddings are just that, two people wanting to be married, to say their vows to each other, in front of their nearest & dearest with whom they celebrate their day - at least that's what happens at my client's weddings, most of whom are around 30 with their feet planted firmly on the ground.
Yes, granted, all women want to show off a little, to look like princesses or film stars on their day (hey, if you're going to be looked at anyway....). They want to be told the effort they have made, the diet, the electrolysis & waxing, the teeth whitening, the botox, the skin regime, the detox, the time spent in the hair salon & with a nail technician & the hours spent devoted to the dress & accessories have paid off & they do look at their most beautiful but if you have a hankering to do something like this, join the local ameteur dramatics society or your local choir, take your other half Salsa dancing or hit a Karaoke bar, re-enact a scene from your favourite film in the comfort of your own home, just please don't turn your wedding into a spectacle. I personally like the comment on Youtube that said "Oh my god, I've just thrown up in my mouth" - that one I could relate to!
And one, almost, last thing.... the wedding 'theme' was 'movies' & apparently the bride walked down her aisle to "How do you solve a problem like Maria". No comment needed I feel - just putting it out there.I once had a bride walk down her aisle to Nina Simone's "I'm feeling good", which I liked - it was a great choice for her dressed in a corset & slinky fishtail but tricky for her Dad, who found the last minute lesson in walking to it not the easiest thing to pick up on the hop.
On the subject of your first dance, I believe it's about the two of you. During a radio interview about the wedding, the bride told the show's hosts that as a wedding photographer she goes to loads of weddings & "you get to the first dance & you're thinking ahh..... do something great! And then it's usually shuffling around to Careless Whisper or something like that" - well OK, I understand photographers want good shots but Bride & Grooms are not performing monkeys & the first dance is actually about them & not about giving their photographer moves worth shooting. I would think knowing the photographer you are considering thinks that, that it would put some couples off booking her - not only would you feel pressure to plan an extravaganza but you've got the added pressure to come up with a winning dance routine (Gretna Green or Las Vegas 'Drive through wedding' would start to sound appealing to me given that choice).
Now on the other hand, this Father/Daughter wedding dance, also entitled 'Dirty Dancing' on Youtube is great! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHtNhxerdvc&mode=related&search=
An example of putting your personality into your wedding & it not comming over as something staged & choreographed to within an inch of it's life.
And of course you can always go & re-live the magic of the original film & see the final scene here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I7prRsOuVYo
Following on from my Jan/Feb diary entry about my interesting experience in a Venetian shop, one of my clients emailed me, responding to it with her own tale of shop assistant snobbery which she has kindly allowed me to share:
"I just had to tell you... Before my mum and I came to see you and while I was still thinking of a red dress, I saw a reallylovely gown in my local bridal shop. It just happened to be in the window because it was in the sale at £199.I went in and asked what size it was? The 'lady' didn't really seem like she wanted to help me but finally looked and toldme it was a size 12 (well, at the time I was an 18 but was planning on getting down to a 12 for the Big Day) and so Iasked her if I would be able to buy one closer to the day in my size (over 18months away)..."Well, you would have to pay the full price you understand and it is rather pricey......"Cheeky cow! I was even looking smart because I was in a power dressing mood. Of course the next comment from me was"So how much is pricey?""£900 I'm afraid"At this point and after all the fussing and flapping about not really wanting to tell me anything my final blow was something along thelines of "well considering we were looking at a budget of about £3000 that's hardly pricey is it!? Good bye"
I just couldn't believe how rude she was! However in recent months there have been 3 hideous creations in the window:
- one day glow peach poofy job,
- one canary yellow thing,
- And the latest is pale yellow poof with day glow pink netting over the top!!
Need I say more?
I searched Youtube.com for one of my favourite clips from Pretty Woman that should serve as a warning to snobby shop owners/assistants everywhere:
Shop assistant: Hello, can I help you?
Vivian: I was in here yesterday, you wouldn't wait on me.
Shop assistant: Oh.
Vivian: You people work on commission, right?
Shop assistant: Yeah.
Vivian: Big mistake. Big. Huge. She waves her designer shopping bags & announces.... I have to go shopping now.
And promptly glides out of the shop.
Click above to watch that immortal clip.
5th March 2007~
After holding the prices for a number of years, I have reviewed my prices to more acuratley reflect the work involved & service & to reflect the market & the rising prices of silk. The new prices have been added to the site.
Accessory prices have also risen slightly.